And of course my reply was: "Ummm... sure." After all, what are friends for, if not to lend an area in which to gratify fornication needs??
As I mentioned in a previous post, Sparrow might be getting back together with her estranged husband. Last week, they humped like bunny rabbits out in the wooded area of a nearby park. Seeing it was raining yesterday, I couldn't allow a repeat of such an event.
She had asked me after her rendezvous in the park if it was wrong seeing he had a girlfriend. I thought about it for a moment and decided she had the girlfriend outranked, seeing technically he was still her husband.
"Well, it's not like they're married or anything," I replied.
So the two star-struck lovers slipped away into one of my bedrooms last night and made love for twenty-two remarkably silent minutes.
I gave them a round of applause as they shuffled down the stairs and into my living room, both looking like two embarrassed teenagers.
My applause cut short however, when I noticed Sparrow carrying a helmet and a baseball mitt under her arm. I raised a pointed eyebrow in her direction.
She followed my gaze and then snickered and opened her mouth to offer an explanation. I put my hands up, stopping her in mid-sentence.
"Sparrow, I really don't think I want to know."
"Good, because I was about to tell you that some things are best left up to the imagination," she retorted.
Before she left, she dug into her pockets and left .87 cents on my dining room table.
"For the rental," she explained with a wink, and left with her lover in tow.
Now the only question I'm left with is: Do I have to report that on my taxes and if so, how?